Thursday, May 28, 2009

Where Have All the Good Men Gone

So I have been trying lately to put myself out there in the dating world. It is hard but I am trying. I even told a group of ladies from work they are free to set me up with anyone they think would be good for me (I guaranteed one date, no more no less). The ladies seemed very excited with the prospect but as that was only a couple of days ago, no new leads yet.

I have been dabbling in the online thing again out of a lack of any other options. I met a really nice guy - really nice. He is respectful (in law enforcement), patience, good conversationalist, kind and good looking. He was previously married but ended the marriage almost a year ago due to a cheating wife (and they are still friends). We went out for drinks and had a great time. He said he would call but when he did I was having lunch with my daughter so when I called him back a couple of days later he said he was glad I called. We had a great chat (an hour and a half) and he admitted that he didn't think I was going to call him back but really wanted to pursue a second date. We ended the call with him saying he will definitely call me in a few days.

That was over a week ago. I debated what to do. This guy is nice and has told me he likes me too so without trying to appear desperate (I am not desperate yet) I called him. He was not home so I left a brief message to call me. Now I am confused. I have a sinking feeling that there will be no call back and there will be no second date. So why fake interest??

Dating seems really hard. I know this line sounds old but all the good ones seem to be taken - well the good ones who are my age at least. I am trying to be open to possibilities, I truly am. I am not even that frustrated yet as I haven't really been in the dating market whole hearted for very long.

Well tomorrow is another day. If he doesn't call, he doesn't call. There are bigger problems in the world than that.


Wednesday, May 27, 2009

I was doing so good...

So I have been sticking to my new 'lifestyle' change. I actually modified my daily intake to be less points and made me feel better about it. I got up early and ran/walked on my treadmill and was feeling really good about myself AND THEN...

I went to a wedding shower that was being held right after work. The food being served was strictly appetizer type food (food I love) and stupid me, didn't eat anything before I went. I torn into and ate ribs, wings, pitas with dip and even some veggies. (Please keep in mind you my new detox plan severely limits salt and sugar.) I came home with a bloated stomach and feeling nauseous. I woke up this morning thirsty and feeling crappy. Due to this feeling I ate shitty for lunch and even ate candy this afternoon.

Tomorrow is a new day, and that day will start on the treadmill.


Saturday, May 23, 2009

Kids Say the Darnedest Things and Mommy Plan to Eat the Strangest

My beautiful daughter and I were eating lunch today and she dropped a piece of apple onto the floor. She looked at me, cocked her pigtailed head and said, "Oh shit."

Yes it is bad when your child swears but it is also a little funny. I explained to her that was a word only mommy's used and maybe she should try to find one more suited to little ladies like dang or oh no. She looked me square in the eyes and said, "Shit sounds better."

Lesson learned, no more potty mouth. Words for mommy don't fly in my house apparently. Lesson learned.

Since summer is upon us, I am endeavoring to jump start my weight loss, not only for the fact to look good on the beach but also to help control the eating out spending. A friend of mine goes to a trainer who has her on a food detox program to ride her body of all the sugar, salt and processed crap (notice I didn't say shit) that our body craves. The first week of the cleanse apparently sucks cause you want all the bad stuff but if you stick to it, it gets much easier.

You essentially eat the same thing every day. Every two to three weeks you get a new menu that adds in new foods. Here is my menu:

Meal 1:
3/4 cup egg whites
1 cup oatmeal

Meal 2:
Protein shake
1 apple

Meal 3:
3 oz chicken breast
1 cup rice
1/3 cup salsa

Meal 4:
Protein shake
2 rice cakes

Meal 5:
3 oz lean meat (chicken, tuna, buffalo, turkey)
1 cup carrots

Meal 6:
1 cup low sodium cottage cheese
1/2 cup cucumbers

You also need to drink between 3 to 4 liters of water a day.

I began today and it isn't all bad. I did not have my meal two at all and was totally stuffed after breakfast and lunch. There is more than enough food to keep a person going. The food combination seem a little strange but what can I do. I need to loose weight.

Wish me luck - again.


Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Is Wednesday too late to write about my weekend?

I don’t care cause I had a wonderful weekend.

Douchbag daddy came down to visit MJ. I was a little apprehensive because I have been pissed at him lately for being an absentee daddy but I came to a conclusion a little while ago, I don’t care anymore. If he wants to play the martyr role that feels so bad for not being able to see his daughter while he goes to Vegas for a week I don’t care. I don’t comment, I don’t say anything bitchy (which is really hard cause I am really good at making digs), I simply change the topic and ask if I still get my child support. I can’t force him to be a good dad but I can make sure I get paid so that MJ and I can do more things together. Wow, that was a bit of a rant but... The visit was not bad at all. No fighting or screaming. We co-parented wonderfully. We went shopping for my Mother’s Day present (first one ever from him, bran new camera thank you very much). Biggest bonus, I got to sleep in two days in a row!!!

In addition to having a break from solo parenting, I got started on my renovations. With help from my ex (not the most independent stand but whatever) I painted my entry way. Well at least the basecoat is on. I could have tried but I had to make the decision between a clean house and a painted wall... I picked the house. In addition, I bought a cute patio set, hung some blinds in my room, and did what felt like a dozen loads of laundry.

It was a great weekend. It gives me the motivation to continue the renos and get my life in order.


Friday, May 15, 2009

Momma Got a Hurt on Really Bad

So for many weeks I made plans to go out. It was a huge celebration where I work and everyone got together and we rented out a pool hall (yes the whole pool hall) and got our drink on.

It was an awesome time. I had my fantabulous babysitter drop me off so I wouldn't have to worry about my car the next day. The festivities started about 5:30 and I didn't get home until 1:30 in the morning. I danced, I sang, I played pool and partook in many refreshing beverages.

This morning I paid for it in spades... I am still paying for it. I am hungover and sleep deprived but it was worth it. It is not something I would do every week but it was great. On of the best things about the experience was that all of our summer student came out and I was in better condition than him today. He actually fell asleep in one of the reception chairs today. So after staying out later and drinking way more I was more productive than a 21 year old!!

It is now 8:30 pm and I am going to bed. I can only last so long.


Sunday, May 10, 2009

New Addition to My Family

I have great news... we have a bran new addition to our little family today. His name is Leroy and he is a beautiful blue beta fish. My mommy came down for the Mother's Day weekend and spoiled both me and my daughter very nicely. I love spending time with my mom but what I really love is watching my daughter and my mother together. They are amazing together, they play like grandmas and grandchildren are meant to play together.

So, when Grandma asked MJ wanted to do today, MJ responded that she wanted to go get a fish. We had talked about getting a fish earlier this year but she hasn't brought it up for a couple of months. Needless to say once lunch was done, we went off to Pet Land.

MJ loves her fish! She wanted to take it to bed with her. She was very upset when explained about fishes being unable to live out of water. She then looked at Grandma and said, "Can we go get a cat?"


Monday, May 4, 2009

T-Ball is Awful

In attempts to get MJ and myself out and meet other kids and parents I signed up for t-ball. There is actually a league in my city for children ages 2.5 to 3.5. I even signed up to be an assistant coach cause I know how hard it is to find parents to help out.

It was our first game tonight and it was such a gong show. I knew it was going to be horrible, come on, two year old trying to play any sport would not go well. That being said I cannot believe how uninvolved some parents chose to be.

The first strike when when the coach didn't show up - the one who was suppose to bring the equipment. So while her husband ran around trying to find out where it actually was, there was 20 odd toddlers standing around with nothing to do. An inventive (mind you clueless) dad took the initiative to play 'Simon says'. Great gusto but none of the kids really got the game.

Now I stepped up the plate, so to speak, and became the events planner. I started with a great game of ring around the rosie, followed with a sing along of twinkle twinkle and isty bisty spider and finished up with running around the field acting like maniacs and imitating various animals. Parents just kinda let me take their kids where ever and no one stepped in to help out unless their kid was crying.

Then the equipment showed up and it was game on!!

Most children has two parents who accompanied them to tonight's fiasco. Half of the parents there barely interacted with their children. So I helped my team and the other team bat, run the bases and throw the ball all while trying to control MJ. While doing all of this MJ and another kid took off into the field to chase each other - the other mom actually looked at me and asked if I was going to get them. I seriously felt like I was herding drunk monkeys the entire time. A half an hour seriously lasted for what seemed like two hours.

I am just bitter cause the wound is still fresh. Tomorrow is a new day. At least it is a day without t-ball!!

Assistant Coach Moi

Sunday, May 3, 2009

The Ineptness of Being a Mom

There are times when moms don't feel like they are all they can be. Feeling like if someone looks into you life they will figure out that you are faking it and not really a mom.

I know that there are times I should feel like this - when I lose my temper and yell at my daughter, when I give in and let her eat chocolate instead of green beans, when we go to swimming or have horrible packaged food for supper. These are things that all moms do. Now I keep my sanity by knowing these are the exceptions to the rules and not everyday behaviour. I don't chastise myself when en I let her spend a week at the grandparents or when we are the only one who hasn't brought a third (I am serious, some kids have a entourage at swimming). I know these are things single mom's deal with and these are choices I have made.

You know what makes me feel like less of a parent? Not being able to open a stupid puzzle box. Frick. MJ got one for Easter and it is now in a plastic container with the picture of the thing taped to the top. In my feeble attempts to open the puzzle I destroyed the box to a horrible mangled mess.

They let anyone be parent now a days.


Saturday, May 2, 2009

Just Cause I Am a Girl Doesn't Mean I Can't Do It

Men piss me off. Right now is my dad. I am primed and pumped to start renos. I was going to start with my bathroom, as I mentioned before. In addition to a mirror, I am also going to have to relocate a light fixture 1/2 a foot. When I called my dad to find out how hard it was to do he told me (in the most patronizing voice) that don't do anything till he come is case I do it wrong.

Now I know my limits, I do. But there are many things I am fully capable of doing on my own. I have been through two home renovations and have learned a lot. I had an electrician come and teach my how to replace outlets and light fixtures, I can paint a ceiling like a pro, can cut in with the best of them and can even lay lino (as long as there is no seams. I am not an idiot.

I don't mind not knowing how to do everything but I hate when people tell me I can't. Not just in home renovations, but in everything I do. I feel like getting a how to book and doing it myself. Me electrocuting myself is stopping me. I know my dad is trying to make my life easier and keep me safe. I might be able to prove him wrong, but killing myself trying isn't something I want to try to do.

So I have decided to start in another nook of the house. I am going to paint my entry way. If that goes well, I will continue into my living room. There are certain walls that I won't do because it would be pointless due to work coming, but that doesn't mean I can't contribute to the overall progress.

Handily Yours,

Friday, May 1, 2009

Spring into Renovations

Me, like most people, purchase a home we can afford, not necessarily one that we are 100% in love with. One that will suit are needs and has potential. So when I purchased my home last September, I bought one that had enough bedrooms to accommodate visitors, a fences yard for MJ and a dishwasher. I also bought one that is in a desperate need of a makeover.

My home is not bad but I want to redo everything!!! I want new windows, doors, paint, flooring, counter tops, vanity and light fixtures. I have come to the realization that this is going to have to be done in stages. Now I am going to save the big projects (like flooring and replacement of the garden doors) for when my father can come help me, but I really want to start somewhere. If I don't start somewhere, I am never going to get anything done.

After much thought, I am going to redo my main floor 1/2 bath. Even with that, I am going to have to wait for my father to finish the flooring (as it will extend from my new kitchen flooring) and new baseboards and moldings. My father is coming at the end of June so I think I can live without baseboards in one bathroom for that time.

I am going to shopping tomorrow. I need to pick up some putty and sandpaper to prime the walls. There is going to be some work to do as I need to take out a sunk in medicine cabinet and patch a huge hole in the drywall but I know I can do this. If not, I can do this, if not I can always call Mike Holmes right?