Does this Mean I am Bitter and Jaded?? ***UPDATED***

So me and the other half of the free world watched the first black president of the United States Inauguration Ceremony today. I expected to uplifted and inspired by Mr Obama. I wanted to have goosebumps on my arms. I wanted more 'bending the arch of history'. What I got was 'the swill of civil war'.

The speech was depressing. It pointed out what was wrong with the world and with the United States (really, you need to tell us the economy is in the toilet and there is war) and offered little to no solutions. Other than a Clintonesque 'controlling big government' there was little Obama offered in glimmer of hope. Now there were people crying and nodding their head throughout the speech but what was said was a lot of nothingness.

Do not get me wrong, I am not anti-Obama. Far from it. I believe in his drive and determination and think it is wonderful that there is a black President but compared to his speech right after the election, I was disappointed. Does this mean I am bitter and jaded or maybe I expect more from my elected officials in ways of inspiring the masses. (Those who actually know what I do may find this statement funny but I believe a politicians job is to make me feel like everything is not hopeless.)

I guess every asshole is entitled to an opinion, this one is mine.

Bitterly yours,
Moi


*** Watching the inauguration ceremonies tonight and the hope that people have for Obama is very uplifting and inspirational. The hope and joy one person can bring to a nation is magical and amazing. For that I am happy. But why is it that I am more inspired by a dance serenaded by Beyonce that by a Presidential speech??

PS I Love You

On my movies on demand channel there are a tonne of new movies that I want to see. Since I have no life and nothing else to do, I decided that I will watch one last night. Everyone has always raved about PS I Love You (yes I know it will make me cry) so I decided why not. I cried and cried and cried. The movie made me feel bad about myself - how horrible of the movie. I never had anyone who loved me that much to write letters. Yes I know, even those of you with wonderful attentive husbands that you hope would write letters but that isn't the point as I don't even have a husband to question.

So to continue the feeling good about myself I decided it was a good idea after inhaling a bowl of butter popcorn to step on the scale. Hey might as well find out how fat I am on top of having no one to love me right?? I stepped on the scale and guess what... I am down 4.5 pounds!!!! (PS I love you scale.) I have been watching what I eat (sort of) and trying to drink more water but almost 5 pounds is amazing for me. Now that may not have all been in one week but it has been in two. I just went and stepped on the scale (to make sure last night wasn't a fluke) and I am down another 1.5 pounds from last night!!! I know that may be a fluke but I am super pumped, at least it wasn't 1.5 pounds upwards right?

This lovely unexpected accomplishment is not going to be in vain. I have planned out healthy suppers all week and am going to find out the points for each and coordinate a lunch and breakfast to go with so I am well within my points range. I am also going to try and start working out a little this week. The goal for this week is three workout sessions of at least 30 minutes. I will start slow and work my way up.

I am so excited. If this keeps up, I promise I will even post my actually weight in two weeks. If I lose another five pounds from what I weighted this morning, in two weeks I promise, my actual weight will appear on this blog for all to read. (The thought makes my stomach turn but I need to be accountable right??)

Surprisingly happily yours,
Moi

Decisions, Decisions

Just when you think that life is good the way it is, a seemingly easy decision comes along that makes you shake your head. It seems like an easy decision on the surface, but the more you think about it the less you know what to do - and these are the easy decisions in life.

I have been trying to get MJ into this other daycare since I moved here four months ago. Not because I dislike where she is now but just somewhere with better hours. I work 8 to 5 and the daycare she is now is open 7:30 to 5:30. There are times when I need to work past 5, not a lot of times but when I need to work overtime, I need to be there.

So I get the call from the other daycare yesterday. There is a spot open for February 2nd. I went today for an interview. The new daycare is attached to a school which would make the transition into school simple. The hours are better - they are open 7 to 6, an extra hour a day which would be huge when I need it. Now the downside - it is $70 more per month. For a single mom who is not currently receiving child support that is a lot of money.

When I went to pick up MJ from her current daycare after work I spoke to her main daycare provider and found out that I need to give a full months notice - that would be the earliest I could get out (unless there is someone to take my spot) would be March 1st.

Now MJ really loves the daycare she is in now. I am not too worried about the transition cause she adapts well to new situations. But I am torn what to do. I have changed so much in her life in a short time, should I do it again? Please, if anyone has any kind of advice, please let me know.

Moi

Online Dating Sucks

I logged onto my online dating profile today to check my messages. So I have a message from a new guy, thinking, mmm, maybe not a loser. So very wrong. He wanted to 'hook-up for a night of passion and excitement'. If he had posted his pic I would have it all over the internet. The best part of the guy - he was married!! I responded that I hope he gets all the penicillin he needs to clean up the STD's he probably has and his wife finds out what a loser he is.

It is not like I have had only bad online experiences - there have been some good (well okay) experiences but I have to wonder are there any good guys left. Once you are over 30 and single is there any hope? Are there only loser left? Are you just another lonely single loser? (Okay I have to say feeling a bit like Carrie here.)

Online dating sucks but what other options are there? Go trolling for men with MJ in tow. Its hard to be single but I am out of other options.

Moi

PMS'ing Over!!

Ok, so Monday was a great/bad day. I was all emotional and bitchy starting on Friday and couldn't figure out why. Then bingo - i got my period on Monday!! See when you don't have sex (pitiful) you don't worry about when your period comes and goes. Realistically, if I don't get my period, hold onto your horses sweethearts the second coming is hear and God will take care of me!! lol

Life always looks better when PMS is over. Not since high school have I PMS'ed this bad. Everything pissed me off. So it didn't help when the ex showed up at 1 pm - yes, that means he didn't show up 'sometime in the morning' as promised. I realize now that it wasn't so bad. I still got all my shopping done and he helped with housework!!!! I came home to have folded laundry and a cleaned out dishwasher. I know this may not seem like much to you but on Sunday (PMS max day) I was so happy I cried. I don't mean like eyes brimming with tears, I mean full on sobbing, snot running down my face bawling. I was pitiful.

Not that Monday was a fabulous day by any means. Not only did aunt flow come to visit but I was sick - horrible retching sick. Second time with the flu this year (well this flu year anyway). So I dropped MJ off at daycare (hey I am not stupid, I will put up with the pain of leaving the house in -35 weather so that someone else can care for my child when I am sick) and went home to bed. I got a hot water bottle for my tummy and a cold cloth for my head, some Advil for the cramps and went to bed. Well laid on the couch and watched Zohan (funny shit). Not a productive day but a I was glad to get everything over with at once.

It is now Tuesday and all is right with the world. Well not perfect but a lot better. It is amazing that the loss of some blood and vomit will do the body good.

Moi