Thursday, August 25, 2011

Life Changes

My life is my life.  No matter what other people do to make my life change I have to own the fact that this is my life and I need to take control of my life. This week I have had to make some really hard decisions, decisions I did not want to make but ignoring them was not a possibility. With making the decisions I have not really considered other people's feeling but have concentrated on what is best for me first and then how the decisions would impact my daughter.

Most all of my decisions I am comfortable with. The some small ones I have regretted. (Okay the ones I regretted were almost all food choices - bad emotional eater.) The good decisions were hard and some even made me cry. The hardest one this week was the decision to give away my dog. It made me cry. But my dog is a dog and she will be fine. She is a huge source of stress in my life and right now I just do not need any extra stress.

The worst part of my life right now is I have no choice but to make choices. I have no one who can make the choices for me. I just want someone to give me solutions to my problems - easy fixes. Unfortunately I do not think there are easy fixes to my life's problems right now. Absolutely no quick ones. I think I need time to heal and time to grow. 

I need to start looking at me in a different way. I need to start taking better care of myself. I think that needs to start soon.  I am taking a mini vacation in lie of a honeymoon. I am going to take that time for me, to start taking care of myself and my daughter.

2 comments:

fluuufin said...

Keep you chin up...this too shall pass. Have a good trip and enjoy YOU while you're away. This crap will still be waiting for you when you get home. So enjoy your time. And I'm sorry you're going thru so much...it sux.

Spar-Mar Girl said...

Being a grown up really sucks sometimes. Sounds like you're getting things in order to get better for YOU. What a great idea to take a time out vacation for YOU. Probably one of the smartest things you can do right now.

Good luck with all the choices. They're never easy, but it will be worth it!